Growing Up

One of the hardest things a parent can do is let their teenager make a huge decision by themselves. You want them to make the right decision, but when they decide something that isn't quite what you had planned for their life, you cringe. Is this the right decision for them? Part of growing up is allowing them to make mistakes as well as make the right decisions.

Last week, my 18 year old daughter made a very grown up decision. She decided to drop out of high school. She is a junior this year, and already a year behind all of her fellow classmates because when she was in 2nd grade, she was diagnosed with a reading disability, and failed that year. She got help, repeated that year, and moved on. This year, she struggled. She missed a lot of school because of illness, and as a result, was in danger of failing this year as well. Sensing that she might have to repeat this year, she made the decision to drop out. Since she was 18, I had no choice but to allow her to do this. But she has a plan. She is going to study for her GED, take the exam in the summer, pass, and start paramedic school in the fall. I hope that she will succeed.

I know that being a paramedic/EMT is something that she has always wanted to do, so she has done extensive research on how she can accomplish this. It seems that she has done her homework on this subject, and she has made plans to accomplish this. She is a very good lifeguard, and has proven to keep her head in emergency situations. More than one occasion, she has been in an emergency situation and has done well in assessing the situation and taking care of the emergency.

While this is a great plan, and I will support her in this (as all mothers do), I feel cheated in some way. I will not get to see her graduate and walk across the stage to receive her diploma. I will not get to see her take her senior pictures. I will not get to see her prepare to go to the prom and pick out a dress. I will not get to see her do all of the other senior activities in her senior year.

Maybe I'm being selfish, but, dog gone it! This is my only child, and I'm being cheated! Who spent nights working with her on her spelling? Who went to her school for meetings about her progress? Who went to her school programs, water polo games and swim meets? Who was the one who went to bat for her when a teacher said or did something that wasn't quite right in regards to her grade? Who wrote all of those excuse notes? Me, that's who. Not her dad, me.

So, if I'm a little bitter about this decision, it's because I also worked all of these years with her to get where she is. I guess that's why I feel cheated.

I will support her decision, and hopefully she will succeed (and I have no doubt she will). I want all of the best for her.